Missing Puzzle Piece

I really should stop cussing. I’m not sure if it’s so becoming of me anymore……I don’t know if it ever were since I’ve been cussing since elementary school. It’s not my fault though, well, it wasn’t back then in my younger years. I was just repeating what I had heard all throughout my childhood growing up. My mother always cussed around me and at me. And just like a child, I picked it up as a way of talking because I thought it was acceptable since my mom did it. But I’m starting to dislike it even though it’s what I’ve known since I was little. However, I sometimes cuss to the point where my dad can hear me and he doesn’t like it. Says it’s disrespectful. So with that being said, I’m going to make a conscious effort to stop cussing in normal conversation. It’s unnecessary and my excuse is “this is how I talk”. But it doesn’t have to be. I don’t have to continue to talk in a way that wasn’t a choice of my own. This isn’t me. It’s my mother because that’s what she does and I’m just like her in that aspect and I don’t want to be; I want to be like me. I’m pretty sure people thought I had a problem or didn’t understand why I cussed so much in normal conversation all throughout my childhood and teenage years. Even as I went through college, I was still a cussing sailor. And still am. I mean I seriously have the dirtiest potty mouth, it’s ridiculous! I do it at work which I know is unprofessional and out of order but I do because that’s how I express myself…..but it needs to stop because it’s bad. I need to stop. I need to break the cycle and I will. From this point on, I’m going to try my hardest to be in a mindstate where “bad words” don’t exist in my vocabulary. Wish me luck and better ways to express myself.

Missing you when you’re not here, wanting you but you’re not near
It’s equivalent to starving but there’s
an absence of food to eat,
You’re what I crave whenever I want something sweet
I need you to be here with me, need to feel your body heat
The absence of your skin leaves my hands with an attitude
Because they’re upset that they’re not
able to touch on you
My lips go through mood swings, pouting whenever they can’t be kissed
My heart beats differently when your heart leaves mine to be missed
These fingertips trace the pictures in my phone of you trying to feel something
My sad eyes droop with anticipation waiting impatiently until they see you coming
They say absence makes the heart grow fonder, I sit, waiting as I ponder…
Imagination does wonder, and when it rains, it creates thunder
We’ve made it through many cycles of mother nature’s weather
But I love it when the suns shining when we’re both together